Up the Junction

Well, this weekend is Sunset Junction. The best street fair in LA. 2 days of food, funky clothes, booze in the streets, and music. Tons of music. For a complete schedule, go here. I'm really interested in... Saturday: Gravy Train!!! @ 5pm, The Walkmen @ 6:30, John Cale @ 8pm. Sunday: the Rolling Blackouts @ 1:30, The Gossip @ 5:45, Sharon Jones @ 7pm. Oh, and I'm curious to see how the New York Dolls (rather, the surviving memebers of) will wrap it up on Sunday night.

But of course, there is pre-party action...

I'll be DJing at the Burgundy Room, at 1621 1/2 Cahuenga in Hollywood from 10-2 tonight if you'd like to say hi. It's my last gig for a while, as next week I'm off to BERLIN for two weeks! Posts will be sparse; sorry about that.

Also tonight: Little Radio Presents - The Photo Show at Sea Level Records - 1716 W. Sunset Blvd (Echo Park). Free Booze, great photos and DJs Nikki (Silver Sun Pick Ups) Jason (Warlocks) and Kelsey Short Shorts (Adeline), 7PM-11PM. Check it.

And the Junction ain't enough for you? Try this: Saturday, August 28 - Sunset Junction After-Party with great bands!! Performing are: Black Mountain, Dios Malos and the Rolling Blackouts... at Hanging Jury, 1023 Santa Fe Ave, Downtown L.A., from 10:00PM -- ??* BYOB! (http://www.hangingjury.com/)

Time to get our drink on. Summer's almost over my friends...

Cartoon Networking

Sunday night, I was having a drink with Seth Green and I got to tell him that I think "Robot Chicken" is genius.

You think I'm kidding. I'm totally not! "Robot Chicken" is brilliant! It's a stop-motion animation show on Cartoon Network's Adult Swim, which uses old toys and claymation and the like to skewer current pop culture, all in tiny little segments barely a minute long each. Sometimes there's a common thread, sometimes it's just... "Wha..?" I love that. Favorite clips of mine include the Zombie American Idol, Michael Moore's search for the action figure heroes of yesterday (including a transformer that goes from fighter robot to port-a-potty) and the sci-fi/comic geek rumble. Seth Green is co-creator of the show, which features tons of celebrity guest pals of his. It's hilarious. And only 15 minutes long, so it never wears out its welcome.

So then Seth says to me, "Awesome! Thanks! So you like cartoons?" And I said, "I totally LOVE cartoons, but I love warped claymation even more!" And he started to laugh and said, "Wow, thanks! It's doing really well and we're having a lot of fun." "Well, cheers then!" I said, and we clinked margaritas.

Then I kicked Dave Navarro in the leg. Discreetly, but he noticed and I pretended that I got something in my shoe and was trying to shake it out and that was how I kicked him. But really, I did it on purpose because a friend of mine asked me to kick him if I saw him.

Oh, you probably want to hear this whole story. Okay, I'll tell you later, but mostly I just want you all to watch Robot Chicken.

She's Gonna Take Me For A Ride

U... Remember my alphabet thing? Okay, we're at U.

Unrest.

STARTED AS A NOISY IMPROV HIGH SCHOOL BAND AND TURNED INTO AN INDIE LEGEND.

Well, that's what it says about them at TeenBeat, the label they are on, which was started by founding member Mark Robinson.

Unrest are Mark Robinson, Phil Karuth, Tim Moran and Bridget Cross. They branched off with Phil's solo work, as well as the Bridget & Kathi project, and also Air Miami - which had a more mainstream MTV type success than Unrest did. But Unrest is awesome.

When I started doing this A-Z thing, I said I'd write about whatever popped into my head, and why. Unrest pops into my head at U because of the song "Make Out Club" from their last album, Perfect Teeth. Now the band had done amazing staccato pop punk funk weirdness for a few years, but this song was so sweet, so unnervingly catchy in that white boy groove sort of way... And lyrically? "You were the first one, I'll love you someday... you will be the last one, please come back someday... All the time & all the day, into your eyes - deeper the day... Perfect teeth in ninety-four, you kiss me more & I will kiss you..." Dreamy. It has always made me think of my Beatle, my absolute dearest friend in the world, who also happened to be my first boyfriend (for a gazillion years). This agit punk noise pop band from D.C. perfectly captured my romantic youth, in a slightly jarring, but really catchy, tune - and then disbanded.

Viva la Unrest.

R.I.P.

The best television show ever. Thanks, Alan Ball.


Rest In Peace. And may I one day hook up with Peter Krause.

Thanks and Welcome!

I wasn't brought up in a barn. Really. But I also am very, very slow sometimes.

So an extremely belated Thank You to the wonderful folks at LAist for letting me drink on their dime at their 1st Anniversary shindig back on the 4th. It's truly a quality site for anyone living in LA and anyone thinking about living or visiting here - chock full of all kinds of newsy bits, culture (we DO have some!), history, reviews - all well done, interesting, fun to read, and valuable. They know their shit. So check it out already! I also got to hang with a Jason, who edits the thing, and is possibly the sweetest most adorable boy around these days. Negro, please! We all had crushes on you by the end of the night. (Maybe the free booze helped.) I was also honored to meet the ladies of Go Fug Yourself, a truly helpful, clever, and freakin' hilarious read. They are the true "what not to wear" women. Hi Jessica & Heather!

Bloggers unite. Geekdom rules!

On another note, any of you Eastsiders who want to brave the Hollywood parking jungle should do so, and come on down to the Burgundy Room tonight! I'll be DJing with my pal, Mr. I, and we tend to rock the house. It'll be a VERY good time.
The Burgundy is on Cahuenga between Hollywood and Sunset, near all those other bars. We'll be there at 10pm, so come get your drink on!

Oh, oh, so Lazy

This is totally stolen from The Sneeze, and my friend Scott sent it to me (thanks, Scotty!). I can't find the original post, so here it is for you. Thanks, Sneeze dude!
*****************************************************

The other day I bought lunch at McDonald's. My receipt was attached to the bag with a small sticker proudly proclaiming their latest slogan: "i'm lovin' it."

As I gnawed on a so-so fry, I wondered exactly who was lovin' what. Apparently I was lovin' McDonald's, I guess. I don't remember being consulted, but there it was in sticker-form. It was even trademarked, so I guess my lovin' must be heartfelt and true.

Granted, McDonald's and I have a history, but isn't this all a little presumptuous? And do they really need to be dragging the L word into it? They didn't even have the courtesy to say they were lovin' me back! (I won't lie. It stings.)

I thought I'd help Ronald out and whip up my own set of McStickers that cover a slightly larger emotional spectrum...

More Cowbell!

Dude, is this for real?

"Our great country is in a terrible downward spiral. We're outsourcing jobs, bankrupting social security, and losing lives at war. We need to focus on what's important-- paying attention to our children, our citizens, our future. We need to think about improving our failing educational system, making better use of our resources, and helping to promote a stable, safe, and tolerant global society. It's time to be smart about our politics. It's time to get America back on track."

The Official Homepage of the Walken 2008 Campaign
http://www.walken2008.com

Here's one you might recognize:
"Easy guys...I put my pants on just like the rest of you - one leg at a time. Except once my pants are on, I make GOLD records. Alright, here we go: 'Don't Fear the Reaper,' take one..." - Bruce Dickinson, Producer

Red Tides At Night

Please tell me you're humming The Fixx right now. I'm not the only old person who couldn't help it after reading my title line - I'm an 80's child, so sue me.

I went home to SD a couple of weekends ago and brought a friend who had never been. I'm from north county, which is the beachy part of town. Well, San Diego in general is pretty beachy, but the north coast has all the good beaches. (No, I'm not snobby about it at all.)

We took the train down, so we could get full view action. It was his idea, but we were both so sleepy from a long night that had only ended a few hours before we got on that train, that we almost slept through it. The Pacific Surfliner route goes through icky LA and eventually wanders to San Juan Capistrano, turns a bend around San Clemente, and then you' re just cruising past the beach for the next hour. It was lovely. As we made that turn, I taped my friend on the shoulder and kinda grunted. "Oh!" he said, remembering why we had gotten up so goddamn early in the first place to take the train.

Lucky us, it was overcast and dreary. There were no waves, and from what we could tell, the water looked pretty dirty. It was still really warm, though, so we figured we'd try to get some beach time once we got into town. My sister picked us up, took us to Roberto's for a proper breakfast, and told us it was red tide.

"Red tide?" my friend asked. He's from Boston, and although he's spent 12 years or so in LA, wasn't totally familiar with red tide. All the beach kids, know, though. (Besides, I have the advantage of having a dad who teaches earth space science, so we have extra clues.) Red tide is what happens when there is an algae bloom, usually brought on by rapid changes of temperature in the water, which then kills the algae once the temperature changes again. Got it? Quiz later.

Red tide is kind of tough on fish, but doesn't really affect people unless you guzzle it like upsidedown margaritas at a frat party. The algae produces a neurotoxin that can paralyze fish, making it hard for them to breathe. So my friend didn't want to go into the water. I played around in it and lived, so it was his loss. Felt great, actually, just a little mossy.

That night we had dinner at a seafood place right on the water. Red tides at night are pretty cool, as the algae gives off a bit of a rusty glow... There was a sliver of moon too, so it was a wonderful view. The next day, the whole ocean looked red - very biblical. We were back off to LA, though, where the tides are simply rusty looking because they are full of garbage. Sigh...

More Community Service

Hipsters need a place to dance too! The Echo is a great place to have fun... so check this out:

The Echo, located at 1822 Sunset Blvd in Echo Park, has provided the neighborhood with entertainment 7 nights a week for the past four years. With an eclectic booking policy, the venue presents live and recorded music shows with: local bands, djs, dance nights, country nights, Latin, underground hip hop, film screenings, book signings, wine tastings, and all ages shows. We plan to expand the business to an additional space which will hold 700 guests. We have a great deal of support but are also getting some opposition. We need your help. Please sign this petition in support of Echo's growth and what they bring to the Echo Park community. Thank you!

Wonderful You

Check out my favorite email in recent memory... This is why I love my friends:

Okay, so all of you know of my near-obsessive love for the Dandy Warhols, but few of you may know of my similar love for dogs wearing clothing, and also my love for crowns.

When I'm old, I will wear a crown full-time, listen to the Dandys constantly on my fingernail sized iPod and dress (his chihuahua) Jack-Clone v.3.0 in harajuku fashions and the occasional top hat. Life will be grand.

Until that time is upon us, here is the unlikely intersection of my three obsessions, in a pop video that had me laughing out loud and
squealing in delight. They really are the best, coolest band ever.

Go here:

http://www.dandywarhols.com/video.html

and click on "Smoke It"

Kxoxoox

Dress Code Strictly Enforced

From the "Los Angeles Destroys Its Own History" file:

Friends, fellow Los Felizians, members of the media & other cool folks:

I am reaching out to inform you of a horrifying scheme now moving forward to demolish the world-famous Derby nightclub and adjacent Louise's restaurant and replace them with a generic five-story condo / retail development in the heart of wonderful little Los Feliz! With zero publicity and notice to neighborhood residents thus far, Woodland Hills-based Alder Realty Investments Inc. has purchased the property and is quietly navigating the zoning approval process necessary to carry out their dastardly plans.

I doubt I'll have to sell many people on the coolness and historical importance of the Derby in the Hollywood community. Built as the Willard's Chicken Inn restaurant circa 1928 -- with the backing of none other than longtime Los Feliz resident Cecil B. DeMille -- it eventually became one of the five legendary Brown Derbys where Tinseltown's elite gathered between 1940 and 1960. Joan Crawford famously tended bar there in 1945's "Mildred Pierce." And of course Vince Vaughn and Jon Favreau memorably entered via the kitchen in 1996's "Swingers" -- helping to trigger a nationwide swing craze with the Derby as its indisputable epicenter. Whether you're into swing dancing or, like me, have enjoyed seeing local music acts play under its distinctive wooden dome in recent years, the Derby's place in the thriving local arts / nightlife community is unassailable. It's the Derby, for cryin' out loud!

This is the unique historical venue the developers feel they must destroy and replace with condos and chain retail space that could be found on any corner in any city in America. And with the Derby would die one more place in the world with a special character and energy all its own. Another piece of L.A. history gone forever. And that could be the beginning of the end for the Los Feliz we know and love, which is already fighting to hang onto its special vibe in the face of encroaching Starbucksization.

The good news: Resistance to the Development From Hell is already forming! Last night, I attended a meeting of the Greater Griffith Park Neighborhood Council Planning/Zoning and Historic Preservation Committee -- an advisory board to the city of L.A. -- and I was encouraged to learn that a group of concerned local residents and Derby fans has begun organizing the Save the Derby Coalition to focus local opposition to this horrible idea. But they're going to need a lot of help to win this David-V.-Goliath battle.

As I understand the situation after the meeting last night, this thing is a freight train moving on well-lubricated rails toward a destination that will turn a fat buck for people who really, really love money. The only thing that will stop it is a loud outcry from the community -- loud enough to get the city council's attention and make them think twice about the cost-benefit ratio. They need to know a lot of people will be fighting mad about this or it's goodbye, Derby.

With that in mind, I urge anyone still reading this e-mail to:

E-MAIL L.A. CITY COUNCILMAN TOM LaBONGE (who represents the Los Feliz area) at: Labonge@council.lacity.org

As I understand it, LaBonge and the council are the crucial pressure point for this deal. While various committees will be weighing in over a long process, the development will ultimately require city approval to go through. If LaBonge and others on the council see the outcry against it as dangerous enough to themselves, the Derby just might be saved. So outcry today and outcry often! (LaBonge's website: http://www.lacity.org/council/cd4/)

Members of the media: You know what to do.

The Save the Derby Coalition website and e-mail list should be operational soon.

The Derby's webpage on their history:

http://www.the-derby.com/history.html?20,15

Alder Realty's webpage on their plans for the Derby property:

http://www.adler-realty.com/ARI/Investments/Los%20Feliz.htm

Be Good Johnny

Last Friday night, I DJed at the Burgundy Room in Hollywood with my soul brother Iiad. The Burgundy Room is located on the Cahuenga Corridor, with a hub of other interesting places like the Hotel Cafe, the Beauty Bar, The Room, Velvet Margarita, and Tokio... and just spitting distance from Star Shoes and Amoeba and Cinespace and a bunch of other places.

But the Burgundy was there first. It was actually a speakeasy at one point, so there! The Burgundy was a home away from home when people were too scared to hit up the seedy streets of Hollywood because somebody could pull a knife on you at any moment, steal your car, or vomit on your jeans.

It makes sense, then, that the Burgundy has been and remains a regular hang of the "Jackass" crowd.

Loomis, he formerly of the band Wax with a very tailored in a peculiar way beard and a cap worn low over his eyes, is a regular DJ at the Burgundy and former neighbor of mine. And a really sweet guy. He also hosts and participates in many "Jackass" (and "Jackass" related) type shows. He recently had his nose broken while playing in hockey in Russia with some nationals who double teamed the little guy, and now he's going to require major surgery to fix the damage. He claims that he's going to get some reconstruction done, so he's just decided to get Johnny's nose.

Johnny, as in Knoxville. Star of the (horrifyingly) number one movie in America this weekend, The Dukes of Hazzard. (Hey, well, Bush got re-elected too. Don't ask me to explain my countrymen.) Friday night, Johnny and crew stumbled down to the Burgundy, where he could be amongst friends in his time of nerve-wracking opening night anticipation. I've spent many a night at the Burgundy with these boys, and Johnny is like Dad to that crew. Someone is always wanting to jump from the bar to the space over the door holding the fan, or from a ceiling ledge to the booth table, or run naked down the street (which has happened and occasionally flashed on MTV).

The guys were sweet enough to come and support my very first Burgundy gig, which was my first ever DJ gig in LA, when I moved here a couple years ago. They were a blast and we all had a good time, as we did Friday. Johnny was packed in next to me for a while, so I asked him, "You nervous about the movie?" "Hey, whatever happens happens," he said. "I'm just gonna keep riding this train till it ends and pack away some money for later." Good thinkin', my man.

Babes In Toyland

Last night, the BFF & I went to the "grand opening" party for this new music space in Hollywood called the Vanguard. As is usually the case with events like this, the club has already been open and having the occasional show for the last month or so, and evidently this party was to create awareness for the new place and get people in there to check it out. Plus, there was free booze and sushi.

The hot gossip around town was that the folks who book the bands at Spaceland, LA's hippest of the hip of indie rock venues, were behind the whole thing. They had been booking occasionally at the Fonda, a larger venue in Hollywood, when a show too big for Spaceland would play (like Kasabian or Metric or something). Folks say there was a falling out of sorts between the Spaceland kids and the Fonda kids, and the Spaceland kids took their show to the Vanguard.

The place is pretty slick, and right away made me think of the Hacienda in Manchester, if the Hacienda had fake stone walls around the bar near the entrance. It's a high ceiling-ed, fancy dance floor-ed, curtains and cabanas kind of place. A bit classy for the Brian Jonestown Massacre, but that's who they've got next week. The Crystal Method will have a club night, Marques Wyatt has a club night, and super tripster Devendra Banhart will play there in October.

The Vanguard, however, is all about its smoking patio. That's practically half the size of the club itself - a huge, lushly landscaped outdoor area with lots of benches and private tents (where one can pay a fortune for bottle service and close the drapes for the night). There are fountains, a giant Buddha, lovely lamps and lots of space to mingle. That's where everybody is going to be, my friends. It made me wish I was a smoker.

The Buddha was a bit much, though.

Meow Meow Crazy Meow Meow

I am a cat person. Love 'em. But I will NEVER be these people. (And many thanks to Julia for sending this my way!)

******************
Dead Cats Hear No Screams/House smell a little sour? Hear strange mewling in the walls? Maybe you, too, can be a crazy cat lady...
By Mark Morford, SF Gate Columnist

So you'd think if you lived in a densely populated town in Virginia and were 58 years old and spent a good number of your postmenopausal years hoarding feral cats to the point where you finally reached a grand total of 88 diseased and inbred felines all flopped like used rags around your house, well, you'd think you might have accomplished something just a little special. Especially if 29 of your cats happened to be, you know, dead, and your neighbors finally complained of the smell so aggressively that the cops and animal control finally showed up, and they knocked on your door and you opened it and the Great Wall of Cat Stench hit them and they exclaimed oh my freaking God what the hell is going on here?And hence they hauled away all the diseased feral cats and charged you with animal neglect and went so far as to condemn your house and kick you out because of all the toxins and bacteria and animal waste and just overall reeking grossness -- well, you'd think you might at least win the award for Creepy Sad Cat Lady of the Month. Right?

Alas, you would be wrong. Because then you discover that, just down the road in Burke, Virginia, a woman 25 years your senior, a woman named Ruth Kneuven, clocking it at 82 years old, has managed to rack up a staggering total of not 100, not 200, not even 300, but over 420 diseased feral cats (some reports put the number closer to 500) spread over two separate homes. And a whopping 100 of her cats are dead (that's more than you had, alive or dead!), and the dead ones are stuck in plastic bags and in bins and jammed behind walls and lodged between the decaying brickwork all over the house, and the stench became so otherworldly that the cops and animal control finally came and hauled away all her cats, too. And they condemned both disgusting houses and told Ruth and her husband and her daughter to leave ASAP, or else, thus completely obliterating your otherwise very impressive accomplishment.

And now you're all, like, oh man, what was I thinking? My collection of 88 cats was so lame! A pittance! Child's play! I am ashamed and humbled and I stand in awe of Ruth Kneuven's creepy sad crazy-cat-lady greatness!And what's more, that Ruth woman had a husband and a daughter living with her, among all those reeking cats! A triple-threat of creepy weird sadness! Amazing!

It is then that it strikes you that 82-year-old Ruth Kneuven from Burke,Virginia, had the advantage of a whole extra house, thus giving her far more room to pack in far more inbred mangy cats than you, 58-year-old Jane Baldinger of Falls Church, Virginia, and she could build her morbid collection with ease and just stuff the little diseased fur balls into every nook and cranny and cupboard space and domestic orifice, thus making you scream "unfair advantage!" in a strange cackling mewling voice, and rightly so.

But it is too late. The cats have consumed your soul, your psyche, your tongue. You cannot emerge from your dystopian cat nightmare and this is a grand shame indeed, because it means you won't be able to take a long and stupefied gander just across the proverbial street at the famous Internet-fueled tale of yet another world-class hoarder, one who is just like you only, you know, completely different.You cannot, in your distressed cat dementia, know the legend of the CrazyeBay Mom.

Oh my yes, Crazy eBay Mom. She is your soul sister, your comrade incollectibles, the flip side of the same disquieting little coin. But she is not, as you are, a collector of a simply lethal array of sickly and inbred cats, but rather, she is a bizarre and inexplicable gatherer of mountains and mountains of stuff. Crazy eBay Mom. Hers is story that's been making the Net rounds for oh, about four years now. We do not know her name. We do not know where she lives. Hers is a tale told by her laid-back and perpetually confused son, a kid who took it upon himself to document, in over 100 photos and hilariously deadpan captions, his home, his odd life, his wildly OCD hoarding mother, her piles and mountains and stacks of crap. Christmas crap. Glass crap. Kitsch crap. Cookware crap and dishes crap and toys crap and magazines crap and hundreds (thousands?) of well-taped boxes of crap from years of obsessive buying on eBay that haven't even been opened yet, packages that nevertheless have been added to one of the huge yet neatly stacked piles of unendurable massively cluttered insanely claustrophobic crap, floor to ceiling and wall to wall and covering every counter and cupboard and every shower and drawer and table and every possible cranny, blocking out the light and stifling joy, and if you have never seen these photos, you must look and be amazed.

And then maybe, in your investigations, you discover that this sort of obsessive hoarding is, in fact, a popular enough subset of the OCD affliction that it's a rather fascinating psychological condition unto itself, and furthermore many cities and counties in the nation appear to have some sort of hoarding task force and/or informational Web site about, say, how to distinguish a true hoarder from people who are merely annoying sloths who never take out the garbage (hint: true hoarders never recognize any sort of problem) and that animal hoarding is actually a certified and slightly disgusting subset of the OCD hoarding compulsion and you're finally like, oh holy hell.

It's just so true, isn't it? How we just have no freaking idea what the hell people are doing out there, over there, just down the street and just next door and just behind those closed doors and that creepy cat lady or that crazy eBay mom could be, of course, your mom, your grandma, your sister ... or, of course, it could be you. Yes, you. It is enough, I know, to make you shudder. Recoil. Scream out your feline revelation. And yet, no one can hear you scream, because you are, in fact, dreaming, and in your dream you are wearing a huge ungainly cat suit, and it's hot and smelly and something is amiss and you realize you are wandering around some strange reeking house and you are stepping over just an insane number of piles of dried cat waste and everything smells like rotten asparagus. And there are about a million other cats there and most of them are dead and the rest look deranged and insane and are silently screaming for help and pawing at the windows and praying for quick cat death. And you look up and there is this woman walking toward you, and she's in a massive pink housedress covered in mysterious stains and wearing a creepy sad grin, and you're like no, wait ... no, no, it can't be ... no, no, NOOOOO!

Get Down Tonight!

Come brave the wilds of Hollywood... because Iiad & I are ripping up the turntables at the Burgundy Room tonight! And (especially for those of you who keep on bugging me about it!) you know it's been a while since I've done any DJ action at my old stomping grounds and this promises to be a really good time. Really good.

The Burgundy Room
on Cahuenga between Sunset & Hollywood
10pm - 2am

...and I promise to wear a very short skirt. Is that enough?

See you there!

The Harder They Fall

Hey kids - my computer is on the blink, so we may get sporadic...

Today, cuz it's friday, I simply offer you a goofy link sent to me by my wonderful friends. It's Kelsey Grammer walking straight off a stage during Disneyland's 50th Anniversary presentation/celebration or whatever. Here's what my friend (who was there) had to say about it:

The best part is that as soon as Kelsey fell, he screamed "SHIT!" at the top of his lungs. Then as he was writhing in pain in that crevice, he yelled "GOD DAMN it." Bear in mind this was for a press event celebrating Disneyland's 50th anniversary. Classic.

Enjoy.

Car Trouble, Oh Yeah

My car was broken into, right in my driveway. This happened, like 2 months ago, so I've dealt with it, but I've been meaning to tell you all the story at some point.

I'm surprised it hasn't happened sooner, actually. This is my first break in since moving to LA 4 years ago, and second break in since I've had this particular car (1994). I haven't done too bad. One of my best friends has been living in the slightly swankier enclave of Los Feliz and has had her car broken into 3 or 4 times this year.

I'm in Silverlake, where the neighborhood can be really great or really dodgy, depending on which block you are on. About half the time I park in a garage, as my roommate and I stack park in our driveway. My car is not so fancy... bad paint job, front right turn single generally hanging from its socket, busted sunroof, but ok.

The perp in question snapped off a plastic side panel alng the drivers side window and pushed the window down to get in. Interesting technique, and no glass repair for me! I noticed because one of my best friends had just replaced that panel - it had fallen off and the visible infrastructure was making my friend nuts, so he ordered me the new piece and popped it on himself. This was about a month before the break-in. I walked out to my car that morning and thought, "Heeeeeeeey! We just fixed that! Jeez."

I unlocked the car door and saw a homemade CD sitting on my seat. "OLDIES... ELVIS" it said. Hmmm, curious, because it wasn't mine - but I love Elvis. I thought it was a joke. Someone had somehow slipped the CD through some crack in my car. That's when I noticed the stereo was gone.

Well, it wasn't really. This is where it gets pretty amusing. My car is older, so it was equipped with a cassette deck. This was ok with me, as I had a CD player with an adapter that I'd use most of the time anyway, and I have tons of cassettes from my radio days lying around anyway. The thief took the FACE PLATE of the cassette player. They didn't even bother prying the rest of it out, just took the detachable face. Then they went through my glove compartment (which I keep my registration, proof of insurance, and napkins in) and took the CASE for the face plate. They also took a $5 pair of sunglasses (kept in the car in case of emergency) and a pack of gum.

But best of all was the fact that behind my seat (the car is a two seater) is a compartment that held my CD player, the adapter and a whole mess of CDs. Those were all still there, because they didn't bother checking there, luckily for me.

I was mostly upset about the pack of gum. And the CD was too scratchy to play anyway.

For the Record

...Mr. Eugene Record.

He passed away on July 22nd, after a battle with cancer. Eugene Record was a major contributor to Chicago soul, a style of r&b in the 60's and early 70's which is mainly defined today by fellow contributors Jackie Wilson and Curtis Mayfield. It's a sweet, laid back style (with horns!) that may not have been as huge as the Motown or Philly stuff, but soul kids recognize the brilliance of other contributors like Tyrone Davis, Barbara Acklin, Major Lance, and the Chi-lites - a band fronted by Eugene Record.

He was responsible for many of their hits, including "Oh Girl," "Have You Seen Her," and "Are You My Woman," which Beyonce made even more slammin' by barely changing a thing with "Crazy In Love." With Barbara Acklin, he created some sweet soul pop (like "Have You Seen Her" and "Stoned...") for many bands, but mainly Brunswick label artists, the label that truly represented the Chicago soul sound.

After leaving the Chi-lites in 1976 for a solo career (which included some disco - ugh) he rejoined them in 1980, and then left again in 1988 to become a minister. You know the Chi-lites, so check out some of their early work, dig up some marvelous Barbara Acklin, try on a little Tyrone Davis... and thank Mr. Record for giving us such a wonderful catalog. Would ya?

Happy Birthday to You

Tuesday, August 2nd is Dax's birthday. Here's info on the latest benefits for him:

This time, in Chicago, featuring Thrill Jockey's own Tortoise....

Fri Aug 12th @ Empty Bottle
1035 N. Western Ave, Chicago, IL
10:00pm, 21+, $12
TORTOISE, LOCKS
=============================================
and don't forget about Anticon's massive 2-night Dax benefit at Bottom
of the Hill in San Francisco August 5th & 6th:

ANTICON RECORDS PRESENTS:
Fri Aug 5 @ Bottom of the Hill
1233 17th Street (17th @ Missouri), SF
8:30pm, All Ages, $12 and up
WHY?, JEL, PASSAGE, DOSH
+ special guests...
& DJ's:
ODD NOSDAM, THE BOMARR MONK, SODAPOP

Sat Aug 6th @ Bottom of the Hill
1233 17th Street (17th @ Missouri), SF
8:30pm, All Ages, $12 and up
WHY?, ALIAS, DOSH, BAT RAYS (passage & the bomarr monk)
+ special guests...
& DJ's:
ODD NOSDAM, SODAPOP

Go here for more info on how you can help.

Hear Me Roar

In that movie Parenthood, Keanu Reeves' character gets to say something really profound, like (I'm totally paraphrasing this) "You know they make people take a test to get a driver's license, but they let anybody become a parent."

With that in mind, here's my political preaching for the day:

On July 25, a U.S. House of Representatives committee held a hearing on whether pharmacies should be allowed to refuse to fill women’s prescriptions. Anti-choice Rep. Steve King (R-IA) told a witness, who had been denied birth control and emergency contraception by her pharmacist, that she had no “right” to her prescriptions - she only believed she did. Anti-choice Rep. Marilyn Musgrave (R-CO) told a witness whose prescription had also been rejected by a hostile pharmacist, that her “minor inconvenience” – that is, risking an unintended pregnancy – was nothing compared to the “conscience” of a pharmacist.

As many as 20 states officially protect pharmacists like Karen Brauer, president of Pharmacists for Life, who says she’d lecture women customers to get off the pill. Other states are pursuing an even more aggressive strategy. Just last month Wisconsin passed a bill to block state universities from filling birth control prescriptions.

Please tell your Member of Congress that you expect him or her to stand up for women's access to birth control - not right-wing pharmacies that oppose birth control.

Just click on this link to learn more and take action.

In the Eye of the Beholder

Okay, here's a selection of bad album art. I know I've seen worse. Mostly, though, I want someone to find me this record... please?

Take This Job and...

I work for a Corporation. This Corporation has gone through lots of Hard Times, Fiscal Losses, Downsizing, and, eventually, was Sold.

Somehow, I kept my job. I was middlebrow enough to not get tossed out on my ass. Lots of people I know lost their jobs. After the Sale went through about a year ago, there was a meeting with the entire company. The CEO said to us, "Well, the sale has gone through, and now I just need you all to go back to your desks and wait for a call from Human Resources. By noon today (it was 9am), about a third of you will be gone. I'm sorry."

Welcome to the jungle, indeed.

Today was the farewell party for that particular CEO. It seems that he was also asked to go, and he probably knew about it for some time before the rest of the Corporation was told, but we plebians will never really know for sure. He was a nice enough guy, a total wheel in the business, and had to do some really shitty things while in charge. So I was only too happy to have free booze and caviar on his behalf at the Beverly Hills Hotel.

I have one story about this guy that I will share... I'm pretty easy to get laughing, and he figured it out very quickly. He'd always wander past my desk and say silly things and get me giggling. This made him happy. A little while back, I had some oral surgery, which made my face swell up like a balloon. While the swelling was going down, I got a black eye and other assorted bruises from both the surgery and the whole swelling business. I looked like I'd been hit by a truck. I did my best to cover it up... Some extra makeup here and there, shaggier hair, wearing my eyeglasses instead of contacts... But if you got close enough, you could see it. I also couldn't laugh or smile for almost 2 weeks (and I laugh and smile a lot) because my stitches would bust or I'd bleed or something. Sexy.

The CEO wandered up to me during this period (I had to be at work, sadly) and started cracking a joke. I covered my mouth and held out a hand: "No! You can't talk to me." He looked at me curiously, "Why not?" "Because you'll make me laugh and I can't laugh." Then he took a good look and said, "Oh my, what happened? Are you ok?" I replied, "Well, I was DJing at my friend's bar over the weekend, and I played something a customer didn't like and we sort of got into it. But you should see the other guy." He suddenly became very concerned. "Wow, that's too bad... What did you play?"

Then I started to laugh (painfully) and I said, "You don't believe me, do you?" His eyes got big and he said, "What? Well, you're a tough girl..." "Oh my God, I had oral surgery!" He slapped me on the shoulder and smiled real big. "Yea, but I bet you could still take him."

Good luck, buddy!

You, the Night & the Music

A couple Saturdays ago, me and the BFF went out for a little night on the town. This night involved booty shaking and alleged prayer circles, but we didn't actually see either.

First off, we tried to hit the MOCA. I say tried, because we didn't actually get into the place, but we hung around outside for a while. It was the opening night party for the Basquiat retrospective (which will be there through October) and it was a madhouse of beautiful people. Grandmaster Flash was DJing in the plaza in front of the museum, and there was a line of people with passes (like us) going down the street for blocks. Many, many blocks. We stood in line and checked out the crowd. There were clubby people, artsy people, hipster kids, yuppies... The whole shebang. Everyone looked a little snooty, but mostly nice. I guess we must have looked that way, too.

After about a half hour, the line had moved about a block. we still had 4 to go, and a concert to get too, so we decided to leave. Besides, we could already hear the 80's hoochie jams Grandmaster Flash was spinning, and as much as a retro delight as it may have been for some, it was mainly a playlist of songs that I had to be drunk in Tijuana to dance to they first time they came around anyway. In other words, not a big deal that we left.

Off to the sanctuary of the El Rey theatre to see Sufjan Stevens.

I've been pronouncing his name "Suf- Jan," but I guess it's actually "Suf-E-Yan," so I felt a bit like a dork. I like him ok, my BFF loves him and thinks he's hunky. (He is.) We had been forewarned that he is such a spiritual type, that there was always potential for prayer circles to bust out during his shows, and I secretly prayed for such a thing to happen. I haven't been around a prayer circle since I was at 6th grade camp back in Catholic school. Would anyone sing "Kumbayah?" I hoped so. That would be something! But it didn't happen, and instead we tried to spot all the closeted gay guys in the crowd, and count how many people were proudly wearing state shirts (since this was the Come On, Feel the Illinoize tour). I think we counted about 6, and one of them said "Brooklyn," but we included it anyway.

How was the show? It was very sweet. The band was tight, the harmonies were beautiful, and the "cheers" they came up with for each state were pretty great. Don't expect a playlist from me, as I don't own anything by the guy. I can tell you he did the creepy serial killer song. He did the zombie song also. It was a little too precious for my taste, like a cross between Belle & Sebastian and Iron & Wine... And I'll pick Iron & Wine every time. It was packed, and we saw no prayer circles.

Maybe next time. Or maybe everyone was praying at the MOCA. Prayin' on the dance floor, baby!

The Horses Are On the Track

Guess what... It's racing season! In Del Mar!

I love bettin' the ponies. Actually, I don't usually put any money down, I just tell people who I think looks good. And by that, I mean which horses are the prettiest.

I've been going to Del Mar since I was about 10 years old. The track was famously built because Bing Crosby wanted a place near his home in Rancho Sante Fe to race horses. Well, that's not completely true, but it sounds good, doesn't it? It opened in 1937, and Bing was one of the original founders of the track. It's a legendary place... All sorts of famous people hang out there, but most importantly, famous horses (like that one they made the movie about) raced there and the legendary jockey Bill Shoemaker called it home.

In high school, we used to roll in after a day at the beach (the track's nicknames are "Where the Turf Meets the Surf" and "Heaven By the Pacific") and catch the last couple races for free because they stop charging entry after a certain time. We'd place tiny little bets and try to get someone to buy us a margarita... good times.

But I always loved looking at the horses, and the sound of the announcing trumpet, and of course, the anouncer: "Annnnnnnd, away they go!" He had variations on that theme, but not too many. Best of all, there is a theme song to this track, written and recorded by Bing himself and played at the opening of each race day, 15 minutes before post time. (Hear it here.)

In the Bay area, I lived walking distance from Golden Gate Fields, which was also a fun place to take the friends on the weekends. LA has the beautiful Santa Anita Racetrack (which is what think inspired Bing to push for the lovely little course in Del Mar)and it's always a stunning place to bet. But my heart will alays be with Del Mar. And my money too.

Kick in the Eye

The letter T? TONES ON TAIL.


How sexy was this band? Pretty sexy. It was a Bauhaus side project for Daniel Ash and Kevin Askins with a Bauhaus roadie named Glenn Campling, that went full time when Bauhaus broke up. It didn't last all that long, as Daniel got annoyed with the roadie, couldn't get Peter Murphy back into the band, but got David J back and started that whole Love & Rockets thing. They only released one real album and a smattering of singles and EPs, but every time you hear one of their songs... it registers. Was there such a thing as funky goth before them? Bauhaus dabbled in it, but Ash took it further with Tones on Tail, and also included beautiful atmospheric instrumental numbers that anyone could use to dream their days away once the dancing was over. You know "Go!" from the clubs (and car commercials) with it's distinctive "ya-ya's" and tinkly percussion, but you've probably also heard the lovely midnight garden sounds of "You, the Night & the Music" or the "peppy" goth goodness of "Ok, This Is The Pops."

If you like Love & Rockets and didn't know about Tones On Tail, go get the Everything comp as it has, well, everything. Then turn out the lights.

Mercury Rising

Those Brits are getting ready to give out awards again... Do we have any well-publicized national award for an album that has this interesting a selection, like, ever? Nominees for this year's Mercury Prize include Kaiser Chiefs (the bookies' favorite, evidently), Seth Lakeman, M.I.A., Antony and the Johnsons, Bloc Party, The Go! Team, Hard-Fi, K.T. Tunstall, Coldplay (huh?), the Magic Numbers, Maximo Park and Polar Bear.

I like.

Thanks, Jon

This is what I do for a living... Keep people from doing what I'm about to do. Steal someone else's shit.

Friday, July 8, 2005 (SF Chronicle)
JON CARROLL

My colleague just to the right, Leah Garchik, mentioned a few days ago that, in the new movie "Bewitched," the Transamerica Pyramid had been airbrushed out of the San Francisco skyline because the building is a registered trademark, and the filmmakers either could not or did not secure the rights to display its image.

Well, that seems silly. I mean, there it is, big as sin and taller than Coit Tower. Do we have to pay Transamerica every time we glimpse it? Do I have to pay Transamerica every time I type "Transamerica Pyramid"?

Here's a more relevant question: What are the chances the Transamerica would use its high- priced lawyers to sue a major film studio over a skyline shot? Doesn't matter. Filmmakers are required to carry "errors and omissions" insurance, which guarantees that the distributors and/or theater owners, DVD makers, television networks or whatever will not be liable for infringements of rights. Insurers, who want to cover their butts and have no particular investment in the quality of the film, set high and rigid barriers before they will issue such insurance. Which means everything, everything, has to be cleared. Logo on a baseball cap? Needs clearance. Music playing on the radio? Clearance. Clips from TV shows? Clearance. Did you know that "Happy Birthday" is still under copyright, and the estate of the composers routinely charges $15,000 to $20,000 for one verse? (ed. note... I work for the company that "owns" "Happy Birthday," and I ain't gonna tell you the kinds of rates we charge, but I'll say he ain't too far off...) Ditto "God Bless America," which is owned by the Irving Berlin estate, described by one filmmaker as "notoriously hardbargainers."

This is the golden age of the documentary, with movies about basketball wannabes and spelling bees and misguided war policies and dance contests making a splash at the box office. But it is also the leaden age of the documentary -- documentary producers are saying that rights and permissions accounts for more than 50 percent of their budgets.

We all swim in a media soup. Advertising jingles, slogans, trademarks, popular songs, iconic images; they're part of our lives. From the Pillsbury Doughboy to "Go ahead, make my day" -- it's part of the air we breathe. Documentary filmmakers want to portray society accurately, which means acknowledging the great swirl of sounds and images that surrounds us. But because the world is now run by lawyers and insurance companies, they have to pay dearly to obtain the images that define our culture.

Two authors, Pat Aufderheide and Peter Jaszi, have prepared a report for the Center for Social Media, available online at www.centerforsocialmedia.org/rock/finalreport.htm. The problems it describes are brain-boggling. For one thing, rights holders are under no obligation to give permission. If one member of the chorus that sang the theme song from "The Jetsons" feels intransigent, too bad. That singer could also be dead, and the owner of her rights unclear, and then also too bad. If you want to use press-pool footage of a battle during the Iraq war, you have to find out who shot it and who broadcast it, and then you have to figure out who bought the company that owns the rights, and then who bought the company that bought the company, and the very large company that has survived the mergers and consolidations can charge whatever it feels like because why not? If it doesn't gets its fee, so what?

And if, say, you make a documentary for television and get the clearances, and then if you want to issue a DVD, that's a whole other set of clearances. And God forbid you should want to release it in a foreign country, because those countries have different laws and you need to cover yourself there too.

And so forth. I used to think grant writing was the worst arts job I knew, but we have a new winner: the rights and permissions obtainer. The irony is that, with the digital revolution, information has become more and more fungible even as the law has become more and more restrictive. The lawyers are fighting on every front -- music downloading, DVD downloading -- and they are winning their battles, but I very much suspect they are losing the war. Which means that, to use the hypothetical question asked way up there, Transamerica might very well take the makers of "Bewitched" to court over unauthorized trademark use because if it failed to vigorously protect its property, it might drift into public domain and then some, I dunno, documentary film company could use it as its logo.

By the way, I do not own this column. I could not read it out loud on a documentary film unless permission was obtained from the Hearst Corp. If you reprint this column without permission in your church bulletin or hogfarmers informational pamphlet (ed. note - or blog?), you might be subject to prosecution. And since I get a cut of any fees paid for reuse of my column, I have a dog in this fight. Wait, I have two dogs in this fight, and they're fighting each other. Rather than using historical photographs, you could just have schoolchildren re-enact the battle of Gettysburg, while an actor paraphrases the words of Shelby Foote.

(Thanks Esme, for sending me my potential lawsuit!)

Donde Estan Las Ladrones?

July 20 (the official year is 1810) is Colombian Independence Day. I know this because every Sunday around that time of year, my family would head out to Balboa Park in San Diego for the Colombian Independence Day festival. My mom would teach the Colombian kids traditional dances (cumbias) and they'd put on a show in the International Pavillions - an area of the park carved out to showcase every nation that could afford to pay dues for a little cottage (or shared space) representative of their country. My mom was in the House of Colombia, and the best thing about it was the food. There would be tons of food for sale, all made by various Colombian mothers and grandmothers, like a giant bakesale... except with empanadas and arepas and tamales and platanos and yuca and yummy rice pudding and tres leches flan... Mmmm.

My mom isn't in the House of Colombia anymore - she's really pissed off at her people these days. It's always been a tough country, but now she believes everyone there is a thief, a murderer, a con man. Most of her family lives here in the States now, and she is currently a member of the House of Spain. Her father is Spanish, so she qualifies, and the Spanairds are much more cultured.

However, here in LA, I found a couple of interesting ways to celebrate Colombian Independence Day. The fabulous Scene Bar in Glendale is getting nuts with Vallenato quintet Very Be Careful, along with Shesaydo and DJ's spinning cumbia. Watch the hips swivel.At the Getty Center (for free!) on Saturday the 23rd, you can check out Andrea Echeverri and Aterciopelados, w/ Los Pinguos, Los Super Elegantes, and DJ Dark Alley. Andrea Acheverri was the front person for Aterciopelados, a Colombian sort of electronic goth indie band. Yea, imagine it. It's great. Anyway, solo she's kinda like Cat Power, and at this event you get her solo and back with the band.

It isn't all about Shakira (although that's what I'm listening to right now... where do you think I got the name for this post?).

Follow the Leader...

Ethics Test
~~~~~~~~~~~

Here is a tough ethics test, only one question . . . can you pass?

This test has only has one question, but it's a very important one. By giving an honest answer, you will discover where you stand morally. The test features an unlikely, completely fictional situation in which you will have to make a decision. Remember that your answer needs to be honest, yet spontaneous.

Please scroll down slowly and give due consideration to each line.




You are in Florida, -- Miami to be specific. There is chaos all around you caused by a hurricane with severe flooding. This is a flood of biblical proportions.

You are a photojournalist working for a major newspaper, and you're caught in the middle of this epic disaster. The situation is nearly hopeless. You're trying to shoot career-making photos. There are houses and people swirling around you, some disappearing under the water. Nature is unleashing all of its destructive fury.



Suddenly you see a man floundering in the water. He is fighting for his life, trying not to be taken down with the debris. You move closer. Somehow the man looks familiar. You suddenly realize who it is:



It's George W. Bush!

At the same time you notice that the raging waters are about to take him under... forever.

You have two options: you can save the life of G. W. Bush or you can shoot a dramatic Pulitzer Prize winning photo, documenting the death of one of the world's most powerful men.



So here's the question, and please give an honest answer.................







Would you select high contrast color film, or would you go with the classic simplicity of black and white?

Death to the Pixies

After seeing 6 Pixies shows in a week back in June, I decided that I was through. Did I tell you this? I was done seeing the Pixies. My Deadhead-like Pixies fandom, following them about the state (be it the year 2004 or 1990) was over. Why? Because it was starting to feel dirty to me. At least, last year, they were doing "reunion" shows. I could justify (to myself, anyway) needing to catch them whenever possible, because they were going to disappear again. I had to get as much as possible.

Then they came back onto the tour scene this year. But why? They already did the "reunion" thing, and it wasn't like they were supporting a new album or anything. And that meant money, pure and simple. The whole 2 shows in one night thing? Money. And I was shelling it out. I had a wonderful time, granted, but I had decided. This was it.

A friend said to me, "I don't know, Mo. You seem to really enjoy those shows. Why deny something that makes you happy?" Good point, but I guess maybe I don't want to lose any respect for myself or what I love about the band? I'm not sure. All I know, is that it starts to feel less special the more I'd think about the fact that they are just doing it PURELY for the money.

And then, this news:

PIXIES TO MAKE FIRST ALBUM IN 14 YEARS

Reformed alt-rock legends PIXIES are planning to record their first album in 14 years.

The band'’s frontman Black Francis has confirmed the band, who got back together last year to huge acclaim, are preparing to make their first studio album since 1991'’s "Trompe Le Monde"’.

He told The Sun: "“It's all hugs and kisses, I'm pleased to report."

"We have been discussing recording a new album lately. As happy as we are with the success of the reunion tour, we really want to make a record for the right reasons, whether it is successful commercially or not."

He added: "We would be satisfied if it played like our other records, never chart-topping but always in print."

Since the band got back together they have recorded two songs - "’Bam Thwok" - which was rejected for the ’"Shrek 2"’ soundtrack and then released as a download-only single, and a cover of Warren Zevon'’s "’Ain'’t That Pretty At All"’, which appeared on ’"Enjoy Every Sandwich’," a tribute album to the late singer.

And, in addition to that, Surfer Rosa went gold back in June, with the band receiving their fancy gold albums (which means 500,000 copies sold) at their show in Washington D.C. Very nice indeed.

So I may have to rethink that no-more-Pixies-shows business. But I'll wait for the album and see.

Hip Hop Hooray

On the Dax Pierson recovery front... I was just telling a friend tonight that I hadn't heard anything for a while, and then... News! Another benefit show in SF, so check it out:

anticon. presents a TWO-DAY Dax benefit @ Bottom of the Hill Friday, August 5 & Saturday, August 6th in SAN FRANCISCO:

Fri Aug 5
WHY?
Jel
Passage (solo)
Dosh
DJ 's: odd nosdam, the bomarr monk & sodapop
+ special guests
@ Bottom of the Hill, 1233 17th Street (17th @ Missouri)
8:30pm, All Ages, $12 and up

Sat Aug 6
WHY?
Alias
Dosh
Bat Rays (2/3 of Restiform Bodies)
DJ 's: odd nosdam & sodapop
+ special guests
@ Bottom of the Hill, 1233 17th Street (17th @ Missouri)
8:30pm, All Ages, $12 and up

please go to Ticketweb to purchase tickets. These shows will most likely sell out.
****THE LINE-UPS THAT TICKETWEB HAS LISTED AS OF 7/14 ARE INCORRECT,
THE CORRECT LINE-UPS ARE SHOWN IN THIS POSTING.*****

Also, Dax is looking to come home! If you live in the Bay Area and know of any housing that would work for an amazing person in a wheelchair, get in touch with Dax. He is someone with a special kind of something that has touched many people all over the world, and it's time to give some of that back to him. Go here for more info.

Peace out.

The Sounds of Summer

"Troop Beverly Hills 2: Summer In Silverlake."

Want to know more? Yes!! (So click here already!) I laughed, I cried, I cracked open a PBR. Truly genius.

Friskytown!

My good friend Kitty calls San Francisco "Friskytown." You can never refer to it as "Frisco" to anyone who lives in the Bay Area; that is completely sacrilegious. You can call it "SF," or even "San Fran," but don't ever call it "Frisco."

Most people who live in the Bay Area refer to it as The City. "Are you going to he City tonight?" "Oh, there's a great show in The City." "I'm having lunch in The City." Stuff like that. Kitty was born and raised in Oakland, in the East Bay (where I also lived for about 15 years) and she is probably one of the few people I can think of who could refer to The City as "Friskytown" and get away with it.

There is even a little tirade delivered by Eddie Izzard at the start of his show, "Dressed to Kill," which was taped in SF and shown on HBO a zillion times. He mocks the whole "The City" terminology and how citydwellers tend to think of Oakland as the giant parkinglot to the east (A line I've definitely stolen on occasion).

Anyway, I was up in the Bay Area about a month ago and had a wonderful night in The City which I keep meaning to write about. Because, snobby as it may seem, The City is awesome.

My brother lives in the charming enclave of Noe Valley, a mere skip from the Castro and the Mission. The thing I love love love about The City is how damn close everything is... There are many different districts, but it hardly takes any time at all to get to any of them. My brother fixed dinner for me & my friend Heather Marie, who works at the Amoeba in the Haight Ashbury. After some cruising there (they still have The Gap as well as the dirty hippies) we went home for dinner.

Then we zipped out to The Rickshaw Stop in Hayes Valley. This area is right near Market and Van Ness, a big hub of roads, with lots of parking. Yay! This spot was a new hub of hip in town, as they offer interesting new indie bands from around the country(like Helen Stellar, Space Mountain, or Casiotone For the Painfully Alone) , fun dance nights (like the ever wonderful Bardot A Go Go) and independent hip hop. We were there on a hip hop night, which started off interesting but then got a little gangsta, so we moved on. But generally a good vibe and cool staff. And Speakeasy beer! Speakeasy beer (a local brew) is the best.

I dropped off my friend and went over to 1015 Folsom in the South of Market area. This is normally a club I would never set foot in, because it's one of those places that usually has a line two blocks deep of ditzy girls with halter tops and guys with slick hair and shiny shirts and then they charge $20 to get in on top of that. But my friend Disco Shawn was DJing, and if I wanted to see him, this was my only chance. And Peaches was DJing the big room. And I was on the guestlist.

The place was maybe 1/3 full, because they didn't advertise that Peaches was in town (because you KNOW the Bay Area crowd loves a freak like Peaches) and also because everybody leaves town Memorial Weekend, and it was the Sunday of Memorial Weekend. But Peaches was on fire... She had a posse of weird looking art fags and hags with her (one wimpy little white guy in nothing but white corduroy shorts and a headband around his 'fro was especially exciting to me) all hanging around the DJ booth, as she enthusiastically played record after record, occasionally fucking up, and singing along loudly. You know, it's always fun to go dancing if the DJs are playing good music, but it's even more fun when they are getting into it as well. And for someone like Peaches, who lives to perform, it was a blast just to watch her. She played the basic hipster stuff; LCD Soundsystem, the Faint, Fischerspooner... But when she played her pal, M.I.A., she stood on the table holding the DJ console and sang the whole song ("Bucky Done Gone"), and she even did an air horn thing for the little trumpet solo bit. Too funny.

I got to spend some time with Shawn, but it was late and we were all tired. On the way back to my brother's, I stopped in the Mission for a taco and then went on home. A wonderful night in Friskytown, one of the best Cities in the world. Really.

Rock & Roll Hoochie Koo

So, like, I totally got this email from this guy, and he's like, going on TOUR this summer, you know? Like all over the United States. And it's, like, totally PAID for, and he totally like, invited ME (and everybody else on his email list) to come to one of his shows, you know? It will, like, FULLY rock.

Did I mention it's a book tour? And that he's totally worth checking out? Plan your summer around it, my friends.

CHUCK KLOSTERMAN
THE "LIVING YOURSELF TO KILL" TOUR, 2005


Tuesday, July 19th-New York City


7:30pm Barnes and Noble-Astor Place
4 Astor Place
New York, NY 10003

Wednesday, July 20th-New York City

12:30pm Bryant Park Summer Series
Sponsored by Coliseum Books


Monday, July 25th-New York City

7:00pm Borders Columbus Circle
10 Columbus Circle
New York, NY


Tuesday, July 26th-Philadelphia

7:00-8:30pm Philadelphia Free Library
1901 Vine St.
Philadelphia, PA 19103


Thursday, July 28th-Cleveland

7:00pm Joseph-Beth
24519 Cedar Rd.
Lyndhurst, OH 44124


Saturday, July 30th-Akron

2:00pm Akron Public Library


Tuesday, August 2nd-Memphis

6:00pm Davis-Kidd
387 Perkins Rd.
Memphis, TN 38117

Wednesday, August 3rd-Nashville

6:00pm Davis-Kidd
4007 Hillsboro Rd
Nashville, TN 37215


Thursday, August 4th-St. Louis

7:00pm Left Bank Books
399 N. Euclid
St. Louis, MO 63108


Monday, August 8th-Austin

7:00pm Book People
603 N. Lamar
Austin, TX


Tuesday, August 9th -Minneapolis

7:30pm Barnes and Noble Edina
3225 W. 69th St.
Edina, MN 55435


Monday, August 15th-Portland

7:30pm Powell's
2720 NW 29th Ave
Portland, OR 97210

Tuesday, August 16th-Portland

7:00pm Borders
2605 SW Cedar Hills Blvd
Beaverton, OR 97005


Thursday, August 18th-Seattle

University Bookstore
4326 University Way NE
Seattle, WA 98105

Friday, August 19th-Seattle

7:30pm Elliott Bay
101 S. Main St.
Seattle, WA 98104

Saturday/Sunday August 20th & 21st- Vancouver

Location and Time TBA


Monday, August 22nd-San Francisco

7:00pm Clean, Well Lighted Place
601 Van Ness Avenue
San Francisco, CA 94102


Tuesday, August 23rd-San Francisco

6:30pm Commonwealth Club
595 Market St.


Wednesday, August 24th-San Francisco

7:30pm Cody's
2454 Telegraph Ave.
Berkeley, CA 94705


Thursday, August 25th-Los Angeles

7:00pm Borders Westwood
1360 Westwood Blvd
Los Angeles, CA 90024

Friday, August 26th-Los Angeles

7:30pm Skylight
1818 North Vermont
Los Angeles, CA 90027

Monday, August 29th-Los Angeles

7:00pm Vroman's
695 E. Colorado Ave
Pasadena, CA 91109

Don't Care How, I Want It Now

It's my birthday this weekend, so anyone doing any shopping for me can pick up the following:

Books:
Our Band Could Be Your Life: Scenes from the American Indie Underground 1981-1991
Michael Azerrad

The Dirt: Confessions of the World's Most Notorious Rock Band
Tommy Lee, Mick Mars, Nikki Sixx, Neil Strauss, Vince Neil

Straight Whisky: A Living History of Sex, Drugs & Rock 'n' Roll on the Sunset Strip Erik Quisling, Austin Williams, Lemmy Kilmister (Afterword), Foreword by Henry Rollins

Main Lines, Blood Feasts, and Bad Taste: A Lester Bangs Reader
Lester Bangs, John Morthland (Editor)

Killing Yourself to Live
Chuck Klosterman

Music:
How It Ends - Devotchka
This Island - Le Tigre
Heartbreaker - Ryan Adams
I'm Wide Awake, It's Morning - Bright Eyes
I Can't Stand the Rain - Ann Peebles
LCD Soundsystem self titled - DOUBLE disc release
The Woods - Sleater Kinney
Sad Songs For Dirty Lovers - the National
Endtroducing (Deluxe) - DJ Shadow
You Can Get It If You Really Want It - Desmond Dekker
The Complete Motown Singles (Vol. 1 and 2) - Various Artists

Movies:
The Maltese Falcon
Double Indemnity
Dark Passage
Night of the Hunter
The Philadelphia Story
North By Northwest
Singing In The Rain
West Side Story
Touch of Evil
Heavenly Creatures
Dead Alive
Shaun of the Dead

Thanks a bunch!

R.I.P. Hot Snakes

"So the rather sad news to report is that Hot Snakes will be packing it in after our current plans. It was a complete thrill to be part of and satisfied my insatiable hunger for sinister, throbbing action. Thank you to all that urged us along and leant an ear for us to abuse." - John Reis

Bands in San Diego are terribly inbred, this one being no exception. Members met early on as Pitchfork, then morphed into Rocket From the Crypt, which sort of branched off into the aggresively mathy Drive Like Jehu. And from all of that sprung the Hot Snakes... Raw, edgy, defiant, intense, simple white guy rawk, built to last.

They'll be doing a few final shows; check out the website, SoCal kids - I think we get 'em.

Another great San Diego band bites the dust.

Down In A Tube Station at Midnight

On 9/11/2001 , I talked on the phone with my mother after finding out that one of my best friends, who worked in the south tower, was alive. My mom was not terribly helpful. “Well, I hate to say this, but now you know how the rest of the world lives. These sorts of things happen in most other countries every day.” My mother was born and raised in Colombia , where her family was once smuggled out of the country to Ecuador in an avocado truck because her father had not picked a political affiliation and each side considered him a traitor. Their farm was raided and their home was burnt to the ground.

My heart goes out to London; it will always hurt when things like this happen.

Office Space

I work in a decent office, lots of people scattered around, some in cubicles, some not. I'm not in a cubicle, but I'm not in an office either. I'm sort of in a huge corner, lots of space to roll around in, and 2 big walls of windows. But I also don't have any proper walls or a door, so unless I'm in one corner of my corner, I'm pretty visible to everyone who wanders by.

But I have lots of wall space above my desk, and since I work in the music biz, lots of posters and stuff too. It's my little dorm room: concert posters, band posters, promo pictures... shit like that. I also have the luxury of listening to whatever my computer will get - CD or streaming radio or what have you - all day.

Thing is, I sometimes have to listen to other peoples' music as well.

I keep mine at a level where no one else can really hear it, as do most folks. There is ONE guy, though (isn't there always?) who tends to crank his shit up. At least it's sporadic, but it's about what he's playing, you know?

It's generally either gospel or late 70's/early 80's r&b. Not that I have anything against those genres. Really, though, I don't need to hear "The Greatest Love At All" at top volume while I'm attempting to negotiate some deal. "Caribbean Queen," one of my two most hated songs of all time, still makes a regular appearance on his decks. I actually had to get crazy and tell him how I'm particularly weird about that song, and hearing it makes me want to rip things apart with my bare hands.

Best of all, though, is when he sings along. In a falsetto. Today it was Kool & the Gang's "Get Down On It," and he would happily interject with the various "so whatcha gonna do" lines. He really loves to sing along with the girls, "Let's Hear It For the Boy" really being a favorite.

Another co-worker of mine, who used to sit closer to him than I do (which is basically across a hallway - and STILL he bugs me!) used to crank up her stereo when he played something especially offensive. Her weapons were the Kings of Leon, Queens of the Stone Age, and the Stills. I'm sure this infuriated him, but he'd turn it up and then she'd turn it up and the next thing you know... the entire floor didn't ever want to hear either "The Still In Love Song" or "What Have You Done For Me Lately" ever again. She got another job, so the rest of us get sporadic bursts from the one offensive guy, but usually... it's tolerable.

I did crank LCD's "Losing My Edge" today though. I just love that song.

The Sparkle That Shines

Remember how I've been doing that dorky musical alphabet thing? Well, it has been brought to my attention that I have lingered on the letter R for over a month... What can I say? There has been so much going on! Lots of shows and travel and stuff, you know.

Without further ado... S.

From New Zealand: the Straightjacket Fits.


The thing with rock from New Zealand is that it sounds like it's from New Zealand. It sounds kind of cold and harsh, with an undercurrent of warmth, surrounded by watery rip tides and fog with rays of sunshine forcing their way through. I'm serious, it really does sound like that.

The Straightjacket Fits started up in 1986, but they didn't make it to the northern hemisphere till about 1989. Rough Trade was kind enough to release their first album, Hail, in the UK & US in 1988. The band started with jangly anglo pop, but wrapped it up in noisy swirling guitars and some sneery almost goth elements to create a beautifully haunting thing that mesmerized the shoegazers before they realized that's what they were. Think the Hollies meet Tones On Tail. They were the precursors to Ride, Adorable, the Catherine Wheel and their ilk. Mean, incredible guitar work from Shayne Carter which can't be imitated, and gorgeous melodies concocted by Shayne and co-vocalist Andrew Brough to go along with them created some amazing music.

Their next release, 1991's Melt, was equally beautiful, although their third, Blow, which was released on Arista in 1993 was nice and their last. This is a band that was sadly overlooked and not given their due, in my opinion... If you like anything even remotely shoegazer, this band should be in your collection. They are responsible for one of the most beautiful songs ever written, "She Speeds." Find them, it's worth it.